When does a "dream" just become reality? And at that, how do you decide when that reality doesn't suit you? We've been discussing these themes a lot lately. How long until we know if staying here is working? For people who like to see things happen, we're really struggling right now to decide if what we thought we wanted is what we want.
On one hand it would make sense to quit while we're ahead (but what's the measure of that??) if we aren't happy. But then if we came here at all, we should be willing to stick it out to make it work. To us though, if it means 12 months of so-so life, why bother waiting that long?
As Dustin put it, maybe it's a case of unrequited love. We can try and try and force ourselves onto this city but if it doesn't love us back we'll get nothing but a restraining order. A sad case of couple meets city. Couple loves city. Couple can't make city love them and take them in.
Or maybe we've misdirected the love? Maybe it's an all-of-New Zealand thing and we should pack up shop and move elsewhere on the island. There's no shortage of places that may attract us that's for sure but I guess it feels like there was something here so we don't have an immediate second choice lined up. Yes it would be unfamiliar but if things aren't rockin' here then what's to lose? Aside from patience and moving costs...
It's hard to determine when you need to have a "Dream B" ready in the wings. For us, it feels like such a huge choice. I'm not sure why we feel the need to make a choice rather than just going with what's happening for now. I think part of it must be that we worked hard to get here and if we aren't enjoying ourselves we don't want to sit around not being happy. We'd much rather take action. But which action(s) to take?
I guess we're bogged down at the moment so all options feel insurmountable. But we all know that hasn't stopped us before.
On one hand it would make sense to quit while we're ahead (but what's the measure of that??) if we aren't happy. But then if we came here at all, we should be willing to stick it out to make it work. To us though, if it means 12 months of so-so life, why bother waiting that long?
As Dustin put it, maybe it's a case of unrequited love. We can try and try and force ourselves onto this city but if it doesn't love us back we'll get nothing but a restraining order. A sad case of couple meets city. Couple loves city. Couple can't make city love them and take them in.
Or maybe we've misdirected the love? Maybe it's an all-of-New Zealand thing and we should pack up shop and move elsewhere on the island. There's no shortage of places that may attract us that's for sure but I guess it feels like there was something here so we don't have an immediate second choice lined up. Yes it would be unfamiliar but if things aren't rockin' here then what's to lose? Aside from patience and moving costs...
It's hard to determine when you need to have a "Dream B" ready in the wings. For us, it feels like such a huge choice. I'm not sure why we feel the need to make a choice rather than just going with what's happening for now. I think part of it must be that we worked hard to get here and if we aren't enjoying ourselves we don't want to sit around not being happy. We'd much rather take action. But which action(s) to take?
I guess we're bogged down at the moment so all options feel insurmountable. But we all know that hasn't stopped us before.
You two are definitely asking all the right questions, and I seriously have no doubt that whatever you decide to do, it will be the right choice.
ReplyDeletexx
V.
Thanks for the support! It's a bit lonely without anyone close to bounce these thoughts off of. Here's to the right choices!
DeleteI think I've had a taste of how you feel when I was torn between staying in Toronto or moving back to Vancouver! The thing is, life is really too short to be waiting around for things to happen (at least it's what I gather from my past experiences). Sometimes you do have to be a little proactive to get things done, and if it's not working out, perhaps it's really time to move on a new adventure =)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the good advice! It sounds like you've been there for sure. I am mustering some strength to give it one more proper go and if in a month or so things are where they are now, well definitely time to consider a change I reckon. Dustin's probably changing jobs in a week or two so that might give a boost to us! Then it's my turn!
DeleteHi there you two, Just got caught up on your adventures... and loved reading all of your blogs. Remember one thing.. you make a choice today and you can always change it later. So if you apply to immigrate you can always change your mind.
ReplyDeleteTake care
Shirley
Thanks for the thoughts! Yes, it can be hard to remember that nothing is permanent eh? Big decisions always seem to hold so much power that you forget you can change your mind! And I will definitely hold onto that thought as we soldier on. :)
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